The other day my Mother said something that really struck me – she said that (in her opinion) women don’t ask for styling help, or seek out the help of a stylist, because they’re embarrassed. This statement wasn’t ground breaking, but at the same time it was. It made me think of all the time women spend on keeping themselves in a space of body image shame instead of embracing the body they are given. Listen, I’ve had my share of body image issues, but things happen over the years – losing someone close for example – and it made me realize that we are given this gift of life, and we only get one.
So I'm going to be the change I wish to see in the world. In other words: The buck stops here.
Body image shame seems to be part of the culture of being a woman– why don’t we all rewrite the story starting today? Once you begin to dress in a way that makes you feel good in the skin you are in right now, great things happen. Trust me, I'm living proof. You smile more, you are open to new experiences, perhaps you may even find yourself grateful for what you have and the capable body that has helped carry you through this life.
Starting can be intimidating for sure. The difference in thought patterns will be jarring on its own. After years of being worried about your flaws, it’s going to be a process to correct it. Dressing differently, even a little, will also seem overwhelming as well. That is why enlisting the help of a professional won’t be stressful or embarrassing, it will actually be a relief.
Before you push back on why employing a personal stylist isn’t for you – hear me out. Self care, and investing in yourself is a form of taking care of your family. It's setting an example that you are worth it and therefore so are they. There is a reason why they tell you to put the mask on yourself before helping others on an airplane right?
Below are the top five excuses I’ve heard and the reasons why they aren’t valid.
“Stylists are only for the rich.”
Oh really? How many times have you gone out and bought something on a whim only to find out you have worn it once and realized it actually isn’t flattering, or it doesn’t make you feel great when you are wearing it? Probably more times than you care to admit. The truth is, if you take all of those items, calculate the total cost and throw that money directly into the trash, there would be more money in the trash can than the fee of a stylist for one session, or a closet clean out. Having someone show you how to build a capsule wardrobe in styles and colors that work for you (using new items and some you own already) will actually save you money in the long run. Trust me.
“I don’t really go anywhere fancy, so why would I need a stylist?”
Let’s start with this question: At what point did we start to think that our everyday lives are not worth a little bit of effort to look (and therefore feel) our best? And who said that stylists only work for fancy events? Everyday life is an event, therefore why let another day escape without at least feeling good about yourself.
“I’m too busy to put all this time and effort into my outfits.”
Everyone is busy. EVERYONE. How much better would it be to have an idea of what you were going to wear all week, or on vacation, or to a meeting well in advance? Actually, putting in a minimal amount of effort and working with a stylist will save you time in the future. One session can provide a time-saving plan when it comes to getting dressed so that you can have time to do what makes you happy.
“The days of looking my best ended when (fill in the blank – i.e. had a baby, went through menopause, went through a divorce, etc.)”
This is a big one. This excuse should actually be number one, however, I didn’t want to scare anyone way from the beginning. I will address this in greater detail on a later date – but for time being -
Repeat after me:
I DESERVE MY MOJO REGARDLESS OF ANY PRIOR CIRCUMSTANCES. Period. End of story.
*(MOJO = MAGIC POWER for those of you who haven’t heard that word before)
“I wear the same thing every day more or less, so what’s the point?”
Variety is the spice of life, and if variety isn’t the spice of your life, maybe your daily “uniform” could use a refresh. Nobody is saying that you have to become a different person. A stylist wants you to be the best version of you. If you’re comfortable in similar looks daily, that’s totally fine. A stylist may suggest different ways to wear those items, or show you how to add accessories so that everyday looks have some variation.
Let me just leave you with one thought; wouldn’t it be great to never say the words, “I have nothing to wear,” ever again?
If you’re interested in learning more and participating in our Style Series Clinic (held the last Friday of every month at MAG Fashion Lounge in South Miami) click here for free tickets.